19 Ridiculous Jokes That Will Definitely Put A Smile On Your Face

If you’re having a bad day, here’s a list that’ll pull you right out of that funk (especially if you’re at work and there’s no end in sight).

These jokes might be kind of stupid, but a little stupidity is sometimes exactly what you need.

1. A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. “Ha­­! That’s not going to help,” she said.

“Sure, it will,” he said. “It’s the only way I can see the numbers.” (via Reddit / rustamsatti)

2. I’ve been searching for months for my girlfriend’s killer…

…but no one will do it. (via Reddit / viewerdoer)

3. Why did the turkey cross the road?

To prove he wasn’t chicken. (via Reddit / jaykirsch)

4. Why do flowerbeds have mulch?

So you can’t see their underplants. (via Reddit / BJHannigan)

5. What do you get when you play a country song backwards?

Your wife back, your dog back, and your house back. (via Reddit / Sproose_Moose)

6. I’m very good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet…

…but I don’t know why. (via Reddit / ChrisJTW97)

7. How many kids with ADD does it take to change a lightbulb?

Wanna go ride bikes? (via Reddit / Mick0331)

8. What do an obstetrician and a well-written joke have in common?

They both deliver. (via Reddit / _The_Tourist_)

9. How do you win an argument with your zombie girlfriend?

Give her a piece of your mind. (via Reddit / DemiseofReality)

10. I named my hard drive “Dat Ass”…

…so that every month or so, my computer asks me if I wanna back Dat Ass up. (via Reddit / leviathannTV)

11. The most potent strain of marijuana has just been released to the public.

Reports say that consumption has reached an all-time high. (via Reddit / procrastination55)

12. “Push harder!” I shouted at my wife while she was in labor. “Screw you!” she shouted back.

It wasn’t my fault the car broke down on the way to the hospital. (via Reddit / cualcrees)

13. Did you hear about the corduroy pillow?

It’s apparently making headlines. (via Reddit / Palpable_Charisma)

14. I ordered a time machine…

…and got a watch. (via Reddit / Readitigetit)

15. Why didn’t the Mexican man go bow hunting?

Because he didn’t habanero. (via Reddit / Critical386)

16. When Vanna White dies…

…do you think her family will receive a lot of touching letters? (via Reddit / modern_messiah43)

17. I was looking at a baseball and trying to figure out why it was getting larger…

…and then it hit me. (via Reddit / MagnusPI)

18. I for one…

…love Roman numerals. (via Reddit / ElderCunningham)

19. How do you know if something is too loud?

It hertz. (via Reddit / arewehooman)

Don’t you feel better now? Those are classics in the making.

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