Back in the days when he was a community organizer, Obama went to a Halloween costume party. He was just wearing his street clothes, and he had his wife sitting on his shoulders. The host says to him, “Dude, this is a Halloween party! You’re supposed to be wearing a costume!” Obama replied, I am … Read more…
- Halloween Dress Code: Men: super hero, monster, funny thing, famous people. Women: super whore, monster whore, funny whore, famous whore
- Spoiler Alert: There will be a minimum of 4 “Gangnam Styles” at every party this Halloween.
- Mad props to New York for dressing up as New Orleans for Halloween.
- Thank you Halloween, all of a sudden, cobwebs in my house are decorations!!!
- Halloween = Candy, Thanksgiving = Food, Christmas = Gifts, New Years = Drinks, Valentines = Sex, Birthdays = ALL OF THE ABOVE
- This Halloween, the only Candy I’m interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues.
- If whores, witches, ghosts and hobo’s show up on my doorstep, I can only assume it’s Halloween because our family reunion was in July….
- Happy Halloween… may all of your skeletons stay in the closet where they belong!
- I’ve been invited to the RNLI’s Halloween party… I’m quite looking forward to it. They really know how to push the boat out!
- My mate said, “There’s only one thing that about Halloween that scares me.”I asked, “Which is?”“Exactly!” he replied.
- I’m not buying any apples for my Halloween party this year…That’ll save me a bob or two!
- Brought the wife a pair of crotchless knickers for halloween…There’s nothing sexual in it, but she’ll get a better grip on her broomstick!
- Just thought I’d nip over to my grandma’s, and fair play to her, at 93, she had all the halloween decorations up, cobwebs and live insects in the windows and a skeleton on the couch…She always makes a big effort, but there was no answer. I’ll pop back next week!
- “Of course I’ll attend your no alcohol, vegan Halloween party tonight…I’ll be dressed as the Invisible Man!”
- I was thinking of going dressed as a band-aid for a Halloween party, but then decided against it…It would be really hard to pull off!
- I was a bit afraid of making breakfast this Halloween morning but…I ain’t afraid of no toast!
- Just thought I’d nip over to my grandma’s, and fair play to her, at 93, she had all the halloween decorations up, cobwebs and live insects in the windows and a skeleton on the couch…She always makes a big effort, but there was no answer. I’ll pop back next week!#Halloween
- Money is a bit tight, so I’m not buying any apples this Halloween…That should save me a bob or two!#Halloween
- I’ve found that answering the door naked helps deter trick or treaters…Oh here we go again, two dressed up as Policemen!#Halloween
- Last year I opened the door to a kid doing ‘trick or treat’ in a Gloria Gaynor mask…At first I was afraid!#Halloween
- I got so sick of the trick or treaters that I turned the lights off and pretended I wasn’t in…Fuck the ships. My lighthouse my rules!#Halloween
- Went to a Halloween party at the pub last night, but took ages to get served as they only had a skeleton staff working!#Halloween
- I saw my son eating chocolate even after I confiscated all his Halloween candy. I asked him where he got that from. He said,I always have a few twix up my sleeve.
- There’s only one thing that scares me at Halloween I said to my wife. Which is? she asked questioningly.Exactly, I replied.
- I dressed up as a screwdriver this past Halloween.It wasn’t the best costume but I still turned a lot of heads.
- I told me wife: There’s only one thing that scares me during Halloween…My wife: Which is?Me: Exactly
Any joke, with no filter
