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Zoo Jokes

  • A big cat escaped it’s cage at the zoo yesterday.
    If I saw that I’d puma pants.


  • A big cat escaped it’s cage at the zoo yesterday. If I saw that I’d puma pants.

  • I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.

  • My mate got a job as a lion’s hairdresser at the zoo today. He is literally the mane man.

  • Spent the morning in the zoo treating monkeys with depression…I’m always there when the chimps are down!

  • Spent yesterday afternoon in the zoo treating monkeys with depression…I’m always there when the chimps are down!

  • I took my kids to the zoo last week…Popping back today to see if they’ve settled in!

  • 89 monkey pox cases in the UK…Won’t be long before we’re stood on the front door step clapping the zoo keepers!

  • They say that when you encounter a lion, you shouldn’t move a muscle.So when I encountered one, I stood still for 6 hours…Then a bloke approached me and said, “The zoo is about to close sir!”

  • Apparently to start a zoo you need at least two pandas, a grizzly and three polars.It’s the bear minimum.

  • I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in a cage.The zoo keeper told me it was bread in captivity.

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